Trust

To me this is one of the scariest words...

Once you have been burned a few times, this is very hard to do.

Someone looks at you and asks you to rely on them. Trust them...

Trust must be earned, the same way respect is.

I have a hard time trusting people. There comes a time though, when a person in your life wants you to trust them. They want to earn it....

To trust or not to trust...that is the question.

Odd and End thoughts

Wow life has been a bit crazy these past few weeks.

I haven't even been around to blog much. Wish life would even out a bit. Once I get a new job things should calm down. By all means I love the money overtime brings, but I love my time at hoem even more.

In about a year I am going to be in a wedding. I am really excited about it. She is one of my dearest friends. We were roomies when we were both young, poor and silly. We have remained friends over the years and now she is marrying a great guy. She really deserves this in her life. She has had so many ups and downs. I can't wait to stand beside her and just feel so glad that she is finally with a man that loves her and wants her to be happy.

After so long of not being married, getting back out there and dating really sucks.
Its all about getting to know and finding out the new. Wish we could all just write a little book of all of our qualities, faults, pet peeves etc. and then when you meet someone hand over the book let them take a look. If it doesn't sound good, just hand the book back and go on to the next guy.

BUT!!! I am really lucky, the guy I am dating is GREAT! Taking things slow and really trying to take the time to just enjoy the pleasure of dating. (Maybe that is why I have less time to blog....hmmmmm, something to think about!)

Wonders Will Never Cease

Things that make you go hummmmm.......

I was off on Wednesday and headed to an interview...and my bosses-boss called me and apologized for calling on my day off, but asked if I had a few minutes to talk.

She said that my name had been flying around the corporate office...and I thought OH SHIT!!!!

She went on to say that it was all good and that there were several people at the corporate office that asked her to call me and see if I might possibly be interested in a brand new complex that was coming available and needed a manager.

My mouth dropped open to say the least...as a fairly new employee of the company I am not supposed to be eligible for a management position for well over a year.

She went on to say that I have been noticed at the corporate and that there were many people who thought very highly of me and wanted to skip me ahead because they think I would do well in the position.

So all of that to say...I have an informal interview with the corporate office on Tuesday for the position. I shall keep you all updated on how that one goes.

I am so glad to have internet back and be able to stay connected with the world!

Have a happy Saturday....is anyone planning a big Halloween bash? I am looking to go to one, but will probably have to work...so I want to live vicariously through all my blog mates!

Dance puppet

Gone are the days when it was easy to get a job. Gone are the days when you write a simple resume, go in for an interview dressed in a nice suit and are hired based on your qualifications and work history.

Now it is a song and dance. Your resume has to have something to catch their eye because they only look at it for 2.2 nanoseconds. Then you have to include the all important cover letter.

Then you have to follow up three times.

After you get the granted interview, then comes deciding what to wear.

And at the interview, you must mirror their body language and voice inflection. Laugh at their stupid jokes and ask certain questions and remember key phrases that all hiring managers want to hear.


ITS ALL A BUNCH OF BUNK!!! Why can't things go back to the simple times.

I....Have....Internet

Only took me like FOREVER!!!!

Then they cam out today to install and said they couldn't! I almost lost my cool! But I kept it and we discussed further and we got it all figured out!

So...got all moved and settled with the new roomies and I am still looking for the new job. Just doing it slowly and trying to get what I really want.

So give me a day or two to catch back up with all of you!!!

Internet

I have good news!! I should have internet in a day or so. Apparently I live in an area that is difficult to get high speed, but I am very persistant. And my persistance paid off.

So, give me a day or two and I will driving all my blogger buddies crazy.

Miss ME????

I am alive and well, the move went as smoothe as a move can be expected to go.

I have no internet though, so bare with me...I will visit all of you when I can steal a computer from a friend.

Hopefully soon, I will get internet....


MISSS ALL of you!

Making a Move

Literally!!!

I am getting ready to move and will be somewhat scare around here (yes, more than I already have been...)

But don't forget about me, PLEASE!!!

This move is a good, positive, healthy move. I am getting out of a situation I should have gotten out of long ago. (Part of those changes I was talking about.)

I am going into a situation that is where I want to be. With someone that makes me happy and laugh. Some say I am moving to quickly, but I also feel life is to short and sometimes decisions are made to just take care of things that need to be taken care of. I am looking forward to seeing what the future holds.

So anyways, I may not have much access to a computer for awhile as I am moving from A to B and I just don't want you guys to forget about me. I will blog and pop in for your blogs as often as I can.

Making Those Changes

About a week ago I wrote a blog about making some changes in my life.

I am beginning to set some of those changes in place, a few of them have been hard, as I have had to make some changes in living arrangements, change a few people that have been in my life that have been bringing me down. I am not one to want to hurt anyones feelings...but it is time for me to start telling people what I want and what I want with my life.

One of the other changes I have decided to make is going ahead and looking for another job. So, as I am quietly at the one I have, I have started doing some networking and seeing what is out there. With my background, I know there has to be something out there that is better than the crap I have been dealing with.

I can see the changes in my life giving me more peace and happiness. Change is hard but well worth the price down the road.

There is a funny dynamic that changed in my life today that I do feel may bring some funny blog material down the road. I inherited an interesting roommate today...we will see how this turns out.

Sorry

I owe all my blogger family a big SORRY!!!

I have not disappeared or gotten snatched by the boogey man...

I know many of you have emailed me wondering where my butt is,

I have been working insane hours and by the time I get home there is nothing but mush up there in my brain....

So this is short and sweet as I am getting ready for yet another day of work....

HUGS to all of you!

No help

Ok guys!!! Where are you guys at when I really need you??

This morning at 4:45 I had the crap scared outta me!!

For the last week I have been house sitting for a couple that is vacationing in Washington.

They have a dog and a cat. (Dog is worthless, its afraid of its own shadow)

So there I was sound asleep on the couch with the cat sleeping with me.

And next thing I know there is loud crashing, banging noise. I jumped up and grabbed the phone and called 911, ran to the pantry area and grabbed a large stick that was there and waited for the police. They showed up and walked the perimeter, and the house. Whatever it was was long gone, but there was ZERO chance of me being to fall back to sleep....

I hate the feeling of wondering if there is someone going to break in!!! SCARY!!

My Friends

Good Morning all my bloggerville buddies and new friends.

This is a quick note to let some of you know that I have not stopped visiting your blog or stopped commenting...

There are a few of your blogs that when I click on your link to go read whatever tasty tidbit you have written, my computer freezes up and I am unable to read, click back or do a damn thing. I end up having to CTL-ALT-DELETE...and it makes me GRRRRRR!!!


So I want all of you to know that I will continue to get to all my favorite peoples blogs, but if I am missing, just know I am still thinking about all of you and that I have not stopped visiting you all....

Change

People are often terrified of having change in their lives. People get used to their comfort zones, and are resistant to the growth possibilities that change can bring.

But I view change as means to grow and continue to learn. New experiences bring new growth.

There are some changes I am making in my own personal life. There are changes that I am making that will better me as a person. Some of the changes are mental, they require me to start thinking in a different manner, to be more self disciplined.

Self discipline is one area that I really have always lacked and I am trying to teach myself to have a better self discipline and the mental ability to push through hard or tough situations.

I think half the battle to getting something you want in your life is the mental strength behind the persons motivation.

So all of this to say, I am starting to make some fresh, positive changes in my life that are good, positive and make me a happy girl.

Still Around

Nope, I have not fallen off the face of the earth.

I am having a hard time balancing work, my few extra curricular activities and computer time....

Yesterday, I was having a conversation with a friend, and I was telling her how much I miss it when I can't make my visits to my friends...and I ended up laughing because she is not a blogger and doesn't understand that my daily trip around bloggerville is like an addiction...

I miss Enemy, Spongy, Jay, Chucky, Echo, Queen Anne, Greg and I could go on and on...but you get my point.

Right now I am in a dilemma.

I am not necessarily happy in my new job. I love the actual work I do...I am a people person and get to deal with people on a daily basis and I have met some of the nicest most interesting people...but there are a few things that are really grating against my nerves at work...

At this point I am trying to decide, if I want to try to stick it out and see if I can bear these annoyances, or if I should start looking for something else.

I loved my other job that I got laid off of, I was there for over 2 years...and I want to be some place like that to be able to enjoy going to work...

What would you say?

There are only two rules for this: 1. List (10) hard things you wish you could say to 10 people but you know you never will. 2. Don't say who it is about.

I read this on Echo's blog and I really liked the idea...

1. You are so special to me, and there are so many opportunities in life...you are the only one holding yourself back from them.

2. Life is so short and you have already had an accident...slow down and enjoy the small things in life, don't always be so intense about the small crap.

3. Thank you for being a part of my life, my thoughts that make me smile and laugh.

4. Its time to make changes in your life. I know you are set in yours ways and yours is the only "right" way...but its never to late to heal the hurt and for us to start some kind of relationship.

5. You are harder on yourself...lighten up, you are a fanstastic guy and I am so proud do have you as one of my dearest friends.

6. I am so sorry. I hurt you and didn't mean to...in hind sight if I could take back what happened...I would.

7. You are beautiful and so caring and yet you are so worried about what everyone else thinks...its most important to love yourself first.

8. Please take care of yourself...so often you push yourself to physical and mental limits and you are not taking time to just take care of yourself...that really scares me.

9. You make me so angry...you have hurt me a few times and now I have to hide those thoughts and continue to smile, even though I wish I could tell you how I feel...

10. I miss you so much...I wish there was a way to go see you. I would drive there and we would talk and catch up...we would laugh and spend time together.

Ever have those days?

You wake up...you are in a great mood.

You get ready, and head off to work, and all feels right in the world.

You get to work and in a matter of 2.5 seconds that wonderful feeling changes to one of dour and sour.

Yep that seems to continue to happen.

I love when a manager starts a group meeting with, "now I don't want to have to write any of you up, but I will if I have to!"

It makes me want to ask, if she is threatening us. She comes and goes as she pleases (salaried position) and prefers not to go on tours...and will not work an ounce over her 8 hours.

I know when I was a salaried manager, I often was required to work well over 8 hours on a regular basis...OH!!! and she gets every weekend off, and I have not had one!!! and my other coworker has had 3 off since I started. I had to beg for a weekend off in August!

Ok folks, thank for listening to me moan and groan!

Can You Feel 'Em?

Can I feel what???

Am I supposed to feel something???

Barb says yep...feel the good vibes.

I was picked for a Good Vibrations meme by none other than the famous.....Em

So here, in no special order, are five things that get my good vibes going, that put a smile on my face, and make the day worthwhile.

1. My daily morning dose of all my favorite bloggers!!! My day starts with you and a great cup of coffee...I know what is going on in the neighborhood. Your blogs make me laugh and smile and worry about all of you.

2. My cat, he is spoiled rotten and loves me to death, if I am sick or down he comes and cuddles with me...animals have a way of worming into your heart and they really can make a difference.

3. Books...I love to read, it gives me an opportunity to block out the world for a few hours and I can sail away to a far away place....I also learn something new each time I pick up a new book.

4. The new special someone in my life....not really ready to expand on this one yet.

5. My job, as much as I complain about the long hours I work, I do love my job. I get to meet new people every day and if I can make one small difference in a persons life everyday...then I have full filled some small goal in my life.

Now I get to choose people to pass this meme on too...I am not going to choose just a few, I am picking everyone who reads this...why? because this is a great meme to tell about the positives in your life....and there is always a need for positives to be shared....

No title today!

I had planned on posting a great meme blog that I was tagged for, but since all I wanna do is crawl back in bed....

I got hit with one of those mid summer head colds. Nothing like feeling like crap in 110 degree weather.

I promise to be back to normal posting when I feel more normal.

HUGS to all

Ouch, Owie...OHHHHHH!!!

Yep, my feet hurt. Yes, they do.


Why you ask???

Because the silly girl that I am. I found a sale on a really cute pair of shoes and wore them to work yesterday.

Now Sundays are normally quiet and peaceful and I thought it would be a great way to break in the new shoes.

But wouldn't you know it...the day I wear new shoes it is SOOOO busy!!

By the end of the day I am hobbling along and today there are areas on both of my feet that are missing skin. OUCH!!

Chatting it up!

My good friend, Miss Enemy, called me up one day out of the blue and said she wanted to kick back and have a few martinis and chat a little.

So one day when I had some free time, I headed over to Philly and she took me to her favorite place to have some martini's.

And we started to talk...

The first question she asked me is...

Why do you blog?

I blog because I can....joking! Joking! A few years ago I had never heard of blogging and one of my really good friends Chucky talked about his blog all the time and kept telling me to just try it.

The first year I had all of 2 readers and very sporadically blogged. I began to venture out a bit and read some of others peoples blogs and then found a few people that started creating a community atmosphere. So to be honest I keep coming back everyday because of the wonderful people I have had the opportunity to meet...
And NO I am not getting all mushy, I haven't had that many martinis yet.


Next she asked about my other blog, Poets Corner and said...

You love to write poetry. Explain what writing poetry does for you. What can this particular medium do for you creatively that others, be they language based or some other artistic expression, fail to achieve?

Wow that is a mouthful to bite off...I started writing poetry as a 14 year old to deal with some of the really dark, hurtful things in my life. My early poetry is filled with hurt and anguish. It was a way for me to pour my feelings out on paper and not keep it bottled up inside. Words are powerful, I love to take words and make them flow, dance and color a picture of a mood or feeling. In the past I used to draw a little, but the medium would not allow me to express my hurt very well and I grew frustrated. Writing truly allows me a vent for all my feelings and emotions. And thanks to all of you guys who have stuck with me for over a year now. You know I love you guys!!! (Awww those martinis are starting to get to me.)

Now when I drink I get silly and mushy, but my friend Enemy got more intense with her questions....

What are you most proud (the good kind) of in your life? Why? Toot your horn, friend!

Wow another biggie!! I have to say that with all the hardship and things that I have endure in my life, I still believe in smiling, love, friendship and I love being alive. I am proud that when people in my life told me that I would never amount to anything, I squared my shoulders and plunged on ahead. No I am not exactly where I want to be in life, but by no means am I completely unhappy where I am.

Think of one experience that you feel changed your life for the better and set you on a better path? Would you like to describe it?

I have had many experience that have shaped my life...I think the most significant one is having been dumped at 14 years old and made to grow up over night. I got a job and finished high school. I managed to not ever get involved in drugs and mostly kept out of trouble...but the part of my life truly defined much of who I am today.

You know that Jo (another friend) and I talk a lot about life journeys? Do you feel you are on one? What does it mean to you?

Yes I do feel like all of us are on a journey. I just don't know exactly what my purpose is or why I am here. I do know that this feeling makes me very well aware of how I live my life everyday. I look to make a difference everyday in someones life...somehow.

So now that my friend Enemy and I have bonded over martinis and shared a deep interview, this is where I get to ask if any of you want to be interviewed. I know most of you have already volunteered umpteen times, so no pressure!!

I love ya man!!!!