Sunday, February 11, 2007

Pass No Judgement

I have had enough! I have had enough of closed minded people who judge others based on a misguided, conception of what society and the media has labeled other people.

People often judge others because they are gay, or lesbian or goth or a flamer or any other non-conforming belief there is. I have met so many wonderful people who have one of these "labels" and it pisses me off that there are so many others in society who refuse to get to know these wonderful people because they can't see past their own nose.

There are good and bad in all races, sexes, colors, creeds and types of people. A person should never be judged on the color, sexuality, creed or belief. I believe that a should be held responsible for each of there individual actions alone.

I dated a guy not to long ago that got into a small debate with me and I wanted to clobber him over the head. He was a good 'ole country boy, who thinks there is only one right way and that is his way.

There was a commercial on TV about a toy of some kind that was educational and could be given to both girls and boys. He stated, "No boy of mine is ever going to have a doll." And oh boy, was the argument on!!!!

I myself would not purposely buy a boy a doll, but the flat out, judgemental way he stated that pissed me off to the point of seeing red. I in turn asked him if he had a son and a daughter and they were playing together and the boy was playing with a doll of the sisters, how would he react. He said he would take it away and hand him a truck. If the child grabbed a doll a second time, he would whip the kids butt.

We argued about that for two days, until I realized he was a closed minded guy who would never be able to look at others without the proverbial blinders he had over his eyes. Needless to say that was a short lived relationship.

This rant stems from a comment made by a friend the other night at dinner. I reminded them that they were being very closed minded about the subject and they laughed and agreed they were.

To me when someone is quick to judge, it is because of fear. It may be a fear of the unknown about the other person. I remember back when I was in beauty college and I encountered the first "gay" person in my life. "Markie" was different than anyone I had ever met. I didn't know what to think. It went against the upbringing I had, it went against every thing society said. I got to know the person, and when I felt comfortable I asked about it. I have been laughed at by others for asking, but I was curious and really liked this person, so I wanted to know about them. After speaking with this person, they became near and dear to my heart.

Take the time to know someone, take the time to care.


Jay said...

I think we can all be judgemental sometimes. It's just that some of us make more of an attempted to not be that way.

I grew up in a town that was 100% white. No diversity whatsoever. How boring is that? I think that's why as an adult I have really tried to seek out diversity and learn more and more about other people and cultures.

bardouble29 said...

Jay - I grew up in a small town in Oregon. Most of those people were pretty closed minded about everything. I too see out diversity.

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

Good for you for asking questions. Only the stupid choose to stay ignorant.

bardouble29 said...

whimsical- I agree, people make me curious, so I would rather get to know them, rather than judge them

JR's Thumbprints said...

I'm not so sure people are quick to judge others out of fear; Sometimes, they're just stereotyping others out of ignorance, or for a sense of belonging.

bardouble29 said...

Jr's thumprint - well said, thanks for that point also.

Dorky Dad said...

I've found that there are numerous idiots throughout the political and cultural spectrum.

Kati said...

LOL Also grew up very sheltered & had never met an openly gay man before my current job. I've gotta say, the two things that went through my mind the first time I met T. (whom I find VERY Sweet, and with his own lovely, quirky sense of style) was "Oh, sweety, that color of blue eye shadow never looked good on ANYBODY!!! You need a green to go with your eyes!" and "does he realize his earrings are mis-matched?" Took me a couple of "visits" with him before I really got comfortable enough to be truly friendly. And though I never said anything, he discovered on his own that baby blue eyeshadow just doesn't compliment his features. *smile*

It is sad, when people are so closed minded & arrogant and even almost voilent about it.

Baron Ectar said...

I have to say in my younger days I was a closed minded man. I have since come to my sense thank God and accept everyone for who they are and know that is just who they were meant to be. Great Post Woman!

Wizened Wizard said...

You rant good!

Seriously, couldn't you just give some people a dope slap for their closed-minded ignorance? I sure could.

Then again, I was a girl who hated dolls and dresses and anything girlish. Eventually hormones kicked in - as they will inevitably do whether you're gay or straight - and I began to like dresses... short dresses... and boys... (Well, I had always liked boys, but not in quite the same way).

I watched a Spanish movie the other night titled "All About My Mother." It had a couple of characters who were transvestites, getting along just fine with the "normal" people in the story. It was quite a good movie - an unusual part for Penelope Cruz, by the way. The interaction between gay and straight folks doesn't seem to be any "big deal" in most places outside of the US.

You might enjoy what Satan is currently writing about (although he's not exactly everyone's cup of coffee...)

But you aren't just talking about sexual orientation, you're blasting the whole range of prejudice, and I say good for you. Thanks for your thoughts.

captain corky said...

You make a lot of really good points! I played with dolls when I was a kid. Superman, Gi Joe, and plenty of others. I realize that these toys were designed for boys, but they're still dolls.

bardouble29 said...

Dorky - "I've found that there are numerous idiots throughout the political and cultural spectrum."

Thats why I still with the people in my blogsphere...

Kati- But good for you for getting to know him...its ok to feel shy at first, but you gave him a chance.

Baron - "in my younger days I was a closed minded man. I have since come to my sense"

We are all dense when we are young, but as long as we grow and learn.

Wizened - Thanks for the recommendation to Satan's blog.

Cap. Corky - Ya know I asked him (the guy I was dating) about action figures, and he said "those are different" I asked in what way are they different....

James Burnett said...

Nice post. I think you and Jr's Thumbprints were both right.

susan said...

Ugh...this is one of the things that annoys me the most. Why does anyone CARE who is sleeping with who? I don't get it.

One of the best compliments I ever got was when one of my gay coworkers told me that we would be great parents for a gay kid. (His parents had diswowned him)

AND...Boys that play with dolls learn to nurture and to become a good daddy if they chose to have kids.

Anne said...

Thank you for this awesome post. BTW I'm bisexual, tomboy, not completely white, Hindu, vegetarian, and worst of all... left-handed. Oh, and apparently I'm a possum magnet. Lol. Yeah, I just have to be different. ;)