Sunday, January 21, 2007

Dating Sucks....big, nasty....I'll leave it at that...

Grrrr, as most of you know from my blogs, I am a divorcee.....

Getting back out there sucks...after spending over 10 years with someone, you know their thoughts, responses, actions and reactions....they way they think, move and who they are.

My ex was my best friend and hubby so I knew all there was to know.....literally, even things that I could have gone without knowing...literally!!!!!! ( I know I said it twice....so the english police can arrest me)

So, at first I was excited to be back on the dating scene....then I quickly got over it....I hate going through the same motions and conversations....I wish I could just have a card that lists all there is to know about me and hand it to a prospective person, we could trade cards, if there is some things in common great...if not move on to the next person and not waste time....

I have noticed there specific types of people out there to date....

1. There are the people that you meet that end up being the stalker/killer type....you meet them and they fall in love with you at first glance. They all of a sudden appear everywhere you are and "just so happen" to notice you across the room....SCARY!!!

2. There are the hopeless romantics (I am one myself, but I at least make sure the other person is ok with it before I go for it). You have gone on one date and the next day you find an envelope on your windshield....in it you find a letter with rose petals and a poem about finding true love....(this is a true experience that I had, I was totally creeped out.)

3. There is the cute guy that is super, super shy and he won't even look at you the entire date...you find out that there are some super weird, eclectic things about him, you are very intrigued....but the entire date consists of him staring at his plate of food. (again a true experience for me)

4. There is the guy that is a little too over confident...he boasts about how he is, who he is, who he knows, and what he can do for me.....ummmmm let me get out of the way for your ego to fit in the booth as we eat dinner...(again a true story) A guy told me that he was glad I was "plain" so that he could look good....uhhhh, excuse the hell out of me for being me!!! NEXT!

5. Then there is the over sexed guy, he stares at your chest the entire date, by - the - way, I have a face and eyes...yes, this model of woman comes with them....he begins all conversations with enuendos and assupmtions....by all means, I am my own person when it comes to that subject, but not on the first date......YUCK!

Dating is hard...and the strange people out there make it harder...

I am not one to be overly picky. I enjoy people of all races, views of life and outlooks, personalities....etc. But give me a break, are there any more normal humans out there ????

And Halo you are not allowed to make reference to the time that I dated out of dating ads, yes (bows my head in shame) I have done that....It was a very different experience.....

25 comments:

susan said...

I remember all these guys from my dating days. Too bad they haven't grown up yet!

One of my girlfriends has met a few really nice guys through eharmony. You get to feel them out, so to speak, online before you decide if you want to meet them or not.

Chucky said...

Good Luck lady!

Jay said...

I was just going to come here and recommend online dating personals. Oh sure, there are a bunch of freaks out there, but you never know. ;-)

Dating is scary.

Anne said...

Hi! I've never dated much for the reasons you mention. I usually meet people who are a friend of a friend, or I just happen to meet them in a non-dating environment. My last bf sold me insurance. I'm single again now and in no hurry to become attached. That shy one sounds cute. Maybe he'd open up more once you got to know him.

Thanks for visiting my blog. You live in Fresno - we're practically neighbors... in the big picture. Nice blog. :)

Chalice said...

Ha! I have been in this situation but its been awhile. I actually just came out of an 11 year marriage but he was definitely not my best friend. In fact, I found out the person I "lived" with was a complete stranger. Everything I thought I knew about him was a lie. But he left and my best friend and I decided we would give it a go and he relocated here from Texas. So far, its wonderful! And I am Happy!

However, before my husband I had my share of bizarre dates. I hate the ones that stare at your chest. Shit that happens all of the time to me anyway but when you are on a date it would be nice to know they actually give a shit about you and not your tits right??

See this post gives me an idea for a post on mine :) Gotta talk about random dates I have had.. You got my brain working overtime!

Your mention of the dating ad's makes me laugh because that is how I met my husband. NEVER AGAIN!!!

Take care!

The Lone Beader said...

And then there's Mr. Right. Of course, he's been through an ugly divorce, and is now gunshy, and scared to go for it, even though he know it's right. =:0

Dorky Dad said...

Good luck on your dating efforts. I guess it's similar to being on the job market, in a way. I hate that.

bardouble29 said...

Susan - "Too bad they haven't grown up yet!"

Do they ever grow up?? I mean really grow up??? LOL

Chucky- as always you are a man of many words!!!

Jay - "Dating is scary!"

Amen brother....dating scares me too...

Anne - Thanks for the visit to my blog, I enjoyed reading yours. So we are practically neighbors???


Chalice - I can't wait to read the great stories of your dating, I have so many more stories I could share. Might be kind of a funny thing to get everyone to talk about their dating experiences.....

bardouble29 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anne said...

It's not close close, but I could drive there if I wanted to. You're near San Jose, right? I'm in the Los Angeles area. Close compared to, say, Baron's place.

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

I wish you the best of luck.

I did dating ads too. Horrible absolutely horrible!

I met my current sweetie of almost two years on Match.com. I had to turn down a lot of guys before I met him but it was worth it.

bardouble29 said...

Anne - I am a few hours from San Jose...I am almost right in the center of Ca. Well you are definately closer than Baron, although a few months ago, I was his neighbor.

Yasamin said...

i just got dumped tonight. i think im going to join a nunnery. let me know if you need a lift to St. Mary's. lol

ps.. yes superbowl party.. rocks.. msust do!!

bardouble29 said...

Yasamin - Honey I am so sorry!!! But you are too sweet to join a nunnery!!!

Echo said...

I wish I could say I knew more about dating. I've been dating since I was 15 and have had maybe 3 serious boyfriends before meeting hubby. But once, I did see a car driving around with "just married" signs and a sign that said, "Romance.com really works!" So, maybe you could try that?

captain corky said...

Bar, you left number 6 off of your list. Was this an accident?

6. And then there's Corky who would otherwise be perfect for me except that he's married. Damn!

Just having a little fun ;)

Jazz said...

If I ever had to date again...well... I wouldn't. Yuck.

RockDog said...

I did the online match making thing and it worked for me. Of course I had to sift through some freaks, but at elast I could see a picture first (HATE blind dates) and get to know them somewhat through emails before going on a date. That process helped me a lot.

Good Luck!

Baron Ectar said...

Wow - now I know that you are braver then I am. I have only been divorced going on 4 months and dating - oh hell no terrifies me! For all the reason mentioned here and many more.

I know what its like to know someone and to be married to your best friend - thats the one thing I miss about my ex wife - the friend she was to me. Slowly I think we may find that in one another again - until then - I think I will just take one breathe at a time and just live in the moment.

Wow - one brave woman - BarDouble!

Anne said...

My mistake. I don't know why I thought you were right by San Jose. It looks so close on my map. Still good to have you in California. It's Baron's loss. He oughta come out here too. He might make a cute surfer boy. Hee-hee! ...um... he doesn't read this stuff, does he? ;) I see a lot of familiar names here. You throw a good virtual party.

Kati said...

Well, having had very little dating experience myself (and all of it before I turned 18), all I can say is that I wish you luck finding a good man!

Halo7528 said...

do you know that I cringe everytime I see a forest service green jeep lol.......yeah remember you tried to get me to do that dating service thing and tried making me go out with that psycho guy i stood up!!!

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